Wednesday 6/15/11

Wednesday 6/15/11

More drama with DH and the new hair. Remember I told the tale of the very embarrassed sales clerk at Fredrick’s about 10 years ago when my hair was real short. Well, for some DUMB ASS reason, I mentioned it to him. Why did I even engage in conversation with him? Especially about hair. Well, I tell the tale to other women who have big chopped and feel bad and not “feminine” because of the new short hair. Not to make them feel worse, just to let them know I’ve been there and lived. That hair grows back. Well he decided say “Well, you DON’T look good with short hair.”

This is what you come up with… Really? I mean REALLY, DH?

Well, after a REAL evil eye moment, I was like “I look good with THIS short hair.” I mean a LOT of neck rollin’ was taking place ova there, honey child. He was like, “OK.” As if to say I DON’T. Needless to say, I was quite heated. But I didn’t fuss. Matter of fact, I didn’t even want to get into it with him after that. I just said, “Well, hair does grow back.” But I was thinking why do you love diggin’ these holes? KNOWING when what I decide to do turns out AWESOME you end up looking like a pure-tee asshole. But even without all that, why would you say that to your loved one? “Loved” should I put it. I am my biggest critic. NOTHING looks good on me to me. But this I like. So that MUST mean it’s fitting me PRETTY good at very least. And you tellin’ me… Essentially, that I’m ugly. Just breaking it down. It is what it is. You tellin’ me, that to you… I’m ugly. And this isn’t the first damn time he has violated like that. He is TOO quick to say I’m ugly, fat, that I look like a man… But I can probably count the times he’s complemented or told me I looked good. I mean without me asking him and he being ready to go, and wanting to just get me out of the house on time.

I remember a time when I would have just collapsed into a heaping pile of tears, but I guess I’m different now. I mean, if everyone was standing around me in a circle pointing and laughing and calling me ugly and throwing ROCKS at me calling me a hideous monster and the villagers were running after me with torches, maybe I’d feel so ugly I’d just start crying then. But I’m like. A hair style lasts 6 months befor it grows out unrecognizably. Not worth tears.. Not to me. Sorry…

I don’t know. I feel “manly” with my short hair IF I wear the wrong shirt. Like a plain Tee. But with a nice top. Nothing doing. I just don’t hate the way this looks. I imagine as more people see it, I’ll get some insults. But even that.. I really just don’t care what they say. Anyone who has nothing but bad things to say about me, their input really means nothing to me. Seriously. You have a right to your opinion, but in the end.. Still my head.. I know. It sucks, right. How they just WASTE breath? LoL!

Well, I guess that’s it for now. OH! And I decided to keep the mid week rinse in my routine. I think it is a humidity thing as far as the dryness. And I can’t get a real result today, as the humidity here is 38%. No humidity for my Long Aid to flourish in my hair. Suuuuucks.. So I just rinsed and added about a dime sized dollop of leave-in. Sealed and put the Long Aid in. It’s a little dry still, but I think the rinse is a good thing. I just gotta find something to get moisture back in quickly. I’m a master natural, but my major is in Locs. Loose is new. :p So I’m still working on a routine. But I think the midweek rinse is good. 🙂

Well, that’s it I guess.

Ciao.

Jen

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